IN FO U

The meeting with my supervisor went well, I talked to him on Monday. I shared my views and concerns as objectively as I could, which was pretty good, thanks to God. I didn't do this to get my co-worker in any trouble, I did this to make him aware of my concerns and my personal feelings. He appreciated my honesty. He also asked me if I would have any problems confronting my co-worker about my concerns if I noticed her behaving in a manner I didn't like. I told him that being human it is always hard to confront another but I honestly think I can do this if I feel the need. I do believe I can confront her in a positive way, through the power of pray and mediation God enters my heart and gives me the right words at the right time, via the practice written about on pages 86 and 87 of the Big Book. I had to work with her for a short time yesterday, I put my differences aside and treated her with compassion and kindness. The Dalia Lama says the hardest person to practice compassion on is those we don't really like, he actually says our enemies but I wouldn't go so far as to call her an enemy. Here is a man who has to show compassion towards world leaders he really disagrees with and he is able to do that with compassion, he is a living teacher of the way of loving kindness and compassion. My supervisor used this time to give me a performance review also and he praised my interaction with clients and said I was a valuable part of the team, Thanks again God.

My Sunday morning Spirituality group went really well!! I read a story from Came to Believe called " Back to the Fundamentals" the author talks about all the different religions he has explored, his trouble with the finding a Higher Power and his confusion. He talks about 3 basic concepts he gained while looking closely at the Sermon on the Mount, which are have tenants found in all spiritual principles. At last he posed this question to himself, " If you could pick the kind of God that you could believe in, what would He be like." I posed this question to the clients and asked them to write down what their God would be like at this moment, what was their understanding of a God personal to them. I told them it could be anything, it didn't have to be male or female, told them I personally don't believe in a gender specific God, told them about using meetings in the beginning, the Cosmic Muffin that a friend once used, that it was alright to not believe in God at all. I also told them that if they were to stay clean and sober using a 12 step program that sooner or later they would have to cross this bridge and that this was just an exercise in having them think about what a Higher Power was to them. I asked if anybody would like to share what they had written down, saying they didn't have to since this was something that is personal and I respect that. To my amazement 14 of the 17 clients shared what they had written down, to me this took a lot of trust to do. A few of the clients had a non-conventional view of God, after group I praised these client for sharing that in the face of possible criticism from those that believe in God the Father and Jesus. A couple talked about believing but also that they feel they had let God down by their behaviors while using. God was working through me that morning because I received a lot of thanks and praise for giving them one of the best group exercises they have had, I told them it came from God and not Scott. Oh yeah I think Jess posed this question in one of her post so the idea wasn't foreign to me, thanks Jess.

Our treatment center is looking at finding a new location, one that has more room for clients and staff. The one building we are looking at is an old nursing home that is next to a Catholic high school and houses a day care center in the basement, it is also located in a nice neighborhood. Last night we had a town hall meeting, the panel consisted of the clergy who run the school and 3 directors for the treatment center. The treatment center is a safe place, we do not have any issues of violence, when the clients do decide to leave on their own accord for what ever reason they take off for their homes or where ever they feel safe at and don't loiter around the center, they head for higher ground. The floor was open to the concerns of parents and citizens and boy did we get an earful. Some did express their appreciation for the work we do but most expressed fears born out of ignorance and too much CSI viewings. I have never in my life felt so much prejudice in one place, granted I am a white male. No matter how much we explained the screening process, the safety measures that are in place, the fact that most of our clients want help, the fact that we have never had an incident of violence, their fears could not be calmed. Their perceptions where of the raging drunk and junkie, not the beaten person looking for help, true we do have times when tempers flair but we are trained to calm these temper tantrums and also the other clients work as a team to keep the peace within the center, 99% of these temper flair ups occur inside the center and not out on the smoke deck. I am not angry with the people who posed their opposition to us, they where going off of their feelings for safety. I would have liked to mention that the chances of their children being harmed by someone on the streets was greater than being harmed by one of our clients, but it wouldn't have done any good. From the vibe I receive I feel we lost this opportunity but who knows, the crowd wasn't that big considering the number of students who attend the high school and the day care, so maybe board of directors will look a little closer at our record and safety measures in place. It is up to God as always. This was the first time I have heard in person the fears and hatred towards alcoholics and addicts. Society hears about us at our worse and these images are imprinted in the minds of citizens. It also shows the amount of denial because substance abuse and mental health issues effect a large portion of the population but people are leery of opening their own closets to take a closer look inside which is really sad. I am grateful for the Traditions and am a stickler for them but man last night I wish they could have been broken and members of AA and NA could have been present to speak in support of us, but our success is based on not entering public controversy..

Well that's my tale for now.
Peace Love and Light to all.
May your God shine It's light upon each and every one of you.

Scott