I had a cool experience yesterday that I just had to share with you all. I had to work the 3pm to 11pm shift, the itenary for the clients was to take them to an NA event, speakers and pot luck followed by a regular meeting. Prior to loading them all up in the vans, one of the women who just can't seem to follow the rules got in trouble again, her peers caught her using a cell phone and also saw her doing some serious lip locking with her boyfriend, both big time wrongs, so the techs had to confront her on her behavior and make her decide what her punishment was to be which would start after the outing since all the clients and tech were going on the outing, she choice no privileges for 24 hours, no phone, no tv, no visits, pretty much just assigned stuff and smoke breaks, (honestly this comes into play later).
I have never been a heavy attender at NA meetings or functions, have gone mainly because of friends so I really didn't know what to expect. The function was small, much smaller than I thought it would be, but I was reminded that the huge Nebraska AA function was in Omaha this weekend, hour roadtrip, so a lot of people where there. They didn't have a scheduled time for the potluck like AA events I have attended, the food was laid out on a table for help yourself, good food and desserts. Oh yeah prior to getting in the van one of the clients asked me if I would go to court with him Monday, we had attended an AA meeting together Thursday night and he felt a bond with me and wants me to go with him to court for support, what an honor, tears of graditude are rolling just writing about this. The one and only speaker we got to hear was really good, he wasn't the most dynamic speaker but his message was strong, talked about sponsorship, steps, solution, and service, talked about being newly clean and seeing his brother die from alcohol and drugs, he has 18 years clean and sober, he also kept the profanity to a minumum, something that has been lacking in a lot of the NA meetings I have attended. After he spoke I walked around and talked to the clients, their response varied most thought he was alright, they tried to listen for the message, a couple where really inspired. Next up was the regular NA meeting, the topic was Unity because it was National Recovery Unity day, the meeting was started with a unity circle followed by the Serenity Prayer. The choosing of who was going to speak was done in a totally differant way than I had experience but loved the idea, when it was time to pass to the next speaker the person speaking walked over and gave that person a hug and then that person would share and pass the hug on to the person they choose to share after them. To some of the clients this was a bit weird, many had never been around NA before and NA is very much a hugging fellowship where AA is more handshakes and hugs are reserved for people we are close to. Some of the clients were chosen to share, most passed but a couple did share, saying unity to them was the unity they found in treatment being with people who had problems with alcohol and drugs just like them and how it made it easier for them to accept their own problem, they also liked the unity they were experiencing in the room during the meeting. The guy I bonded with picked me to share, I wasn't sure what I was suppose to do since part of me was Scott the Tech but the other part was Scott the recovering alcoholic addict, it took all of probably 30 seconds for Scott the recovering alcoholic addict to speak up and say "Hi everyone, my name is Scott and I am an addict" when I am in an NA meeting I am an addict and when I am in an AA meeting I am an alcoholic in respect to the fellowships. I spoke from my heart without concern for what the clients needed to hear. For me one of the greatest things about unit was finding I wasn't alone in having the feelings inside that were eating me up, the ones that the booze could no long quiet, walking into a recovery room and knowing it was alright to be afraid, to be angry to have problems, unity is the common solution shared that allows us to work on these problems together either as a group or one alcoholic talking to another like it was with Bill and Bob, unity is the love we have for one another during times of great distress; deaths, serious illness, divorces, and other life changing event the events when a fellowship rally arounds the member loves them and helps carry them through so that the member safely comes out the other side without drinking or using. That type of unity wasn't out there for me when I was drinking and using, with the except of a few friends. Unity is the sense of belonging, belonging that I tried to find those 10 years back out there doing research, belonging that I didn't find until I walked back inside a AA room and reconnected with people just like me. I wanted to talk about unity being part of the 3 legacies but thought better of it since it wasn't an AA meeting, I kept my sharing pretty much on using and drinking in general and recovery as a whole, even though my drug of choice is alcohol and with the except of downers it will be alcohol that I turn to if I ever start destroying myself again. Steve wrote about being introverted and full of fear when he drank and how he is the complete opposite today and I really relate to that, last night I was in a meeting of people I didn't know with the exception of one or 2 plus our clients, yet I felt completely at home, no fear, no insecurities about sharing my experience, strength and hope, truly a gift from God. Once again I talked to the clients afterwards and most of them really enjoyed the meeting, more so than the speaker, because of the sharing of other members, really good positive recovery sharing. One client said he was feeling really down prior to the outing but the speaker and meeting lifted him up, the lifting up was echoed by other clients, oh the power of God speaking through others in unity of a common problem with a common solution. I also won a NA candle stick holder that I will give to N, she is more NA than I am, some of the other clients won stuff as well and we had the person with the least amount of clean and sober time and she was given a copy of the NA basic text signed by all present, God willing she reads and applies it to her life.
You know once in a while are allowed to have trully wonderful spiritual experiences and witness obvisious miracles and last night was one of those oppurtunities for me. In my way of thinking we have spiritual experience and witness miracles all the time but we are not always open to them. Last night I was open and aware and you all know why and if you don't ask me in the comments and I will visit with you.
Oh yeah about the women who got in trouble with her peers. The meeting was a pay off because at the end of day group session she was confronted by the whole group and Techs on her behavior. The peers that confronted her did so in a loving and caring manner, saying they were concerned about her recovery and where not confronting her to try and hurt her but where doing so out of love and concern, she did not take it this way but really how many of us new in recovery would have. So once again the message of unity paid off, the clients were in a better spiritual state to confront their peer because of just having attended a meeting, most of them probably didn't know it but they were witness to how God works through other alcoholics and addicts. I am fully aware that most of my clients will not say sober for any great length of time, some will relapse repeatedly and finally find recovery when the time is right and the pain is finally great enough to completely surrender to the disease and a God of their understanding. Others will die from this disease, causing destruction along the way. But last night was a beautiful thing for them to experience and be a part of and whether they know it or not it was a powerful learning tool that will hopefully stay with them for as long as they trudge the road of happy destiny and it may help them return if they step off the path.
Peace Love and Light
Scott
You are safe
2 years ago
2 comments:
I pray that God keep all of you sober for a LONG time. Life is too short to give any of it away to alcohol. My uncle died from drinking -- drank before doing a roof repair job and fell off the roof. So, he lost many years that he could have had -- let alone the years that he was not really there for his family or himself. God bless you -- all of you -- and be with you.
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